CHECOTAH – February is Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month, and the Muscogee (Creek) Nation Center for Victim Services (CVS) is sharing knowledge with teens about what a healthy relationship looks like. The bowling event at Fast Lanes Bowl on Feb. 27 was free for 7th-12th graders, where they learned about relationship topics, bowled, and enjoyed a meal together. CVS wanted to reach out to teens to discuss healthy relationships. This year’s awareness theme is called “Real Love Respects”.
Abuse can vary depending on where you live, what community you are from, or your tribal enrollment status; however, Native Americans and Alaska Natives often do experience certain expressions of abuse in similar ways.
“Combined with the innumerable ways our nation continues to displace and oppress Native peoples on individual, communal, and structural levels, people in Native communities face particularly high risks of experiencing relationship abuse. Studies suggest that survivors make up more than 84 percent of the entire U.S. Native population,” as stated on the Love Is Respect website.
MCN CVS Youth Prevention Specialist Jamie Rolland-Hill (Mvskoke/Euchee/Cherokee/Seminole) said that their program realized that 7th-12th graders are into the dating scene, and they do experience intimate partner violence. So CVS’s goal for this event was to educate them while engaging in fun activities.
For the event, Rolland-Hill presented healthy and unhealthy relationships to the teens; she wanted to make sure they could distinguish between the two. “We’re going to definitely push healthy relationships, we’re going to talk about red flags and green flags, mainly the boundaries and push that as well,” Rolland-Hill said.
CVS was excited to hang out with the teens and to talk to them to see where their minds are at.
They did icebreakers to help participants loosen up and mingle. Another game they played had a line down the middle, and they got to choose which scenario was a green flag or a red flag. After that, she spoke more about the scenarios and asked the teens what they knew about them.
Rolland-Hill believes that discussing healthy relationships with teens can help them later in life identify red and green flags. “I feel like it does, just talking to them, kind of getting on their level, not like talking down to them, but talking to them and just kind of seeing what they know. Because sometimes they’ll tell me certain scenarios about things going on at school, and I’ll be like ‘maybe you should reevaluate that’ or ‘may we should talk about that a little bit more,’” Rolland-Hill said.
Every time she speaks at an event about those topics, she brings a CVS advocate, in case any of the teens would like a more private conversation to ask a question or get advice about their relationships.
“Because I have some teens come up to me before and they’re like ‘oh my boyfriend or my girlfriend called me names all the time, but they say they’re just playing,’ and then we kind of go into a deeper conversation about that because sometimes kids don’t realize that even though they may be saying they’re playful or whatever, it could go into something worse later on,” Rolland-Hill said.
Rolland-Hill said that if any parents or guardians need tips on how to speak to their teens about healthy relationships and boundaries, they should be open and honest with their teens. Also, if their teens are currently dating, make sure to discuss setting boundaries in their relationships.
“Educate your child on what love should look like and what it shouldn’t look like, or call our number if you have any questions,” Rolland-Hill said.
Rolland-Hill said they use loveisrespect.org for many of their resources. While she is open and available to answer questions about healthy relationships, Rolland-Hill acknowledged that sometimes youth might not feel comfortable asking the question. The website offers quizzes that can help identify whether a situation is a red flag or an unhealthy relationship.
For more information, contact CVS at 918-732-7979. To keep up with updates, follow their Facebook page at Muscogee Nation Center for Victim Services.
